I'm the original hbic

calliedope:

when will my master return from the supermarket

calliedope:

when will my master return from the supermarket

(Source: appil, via contradicktingmyself)

asmilinggoddess:

this show is incredible

(via rim-monster)

methbusters:

who wants to hire me as their maid i’m not gonna clean im just gonna wear a cute maid outfit dust like 6 things and bend down a lot

(via neelrugly)

horror movie opening scene

white girl: i dont like this abandoned insane asylum, zack.

white boy: come on, amanda, 10 years ago tonight, the famous blood skull killer committed his last murder right here and then vanished.

white girl: you're just trying to scare me.

white boy: lmao

they continue walking for a few seconds

*white couple hears noise*

white girl: babe what that??

white boy: i'll go investigate

*leaves her alone*

*choking noises*

white girl: zack!!!

white boy: ha ha just kidding!

white girl: asshole!

white boy: im just playin babe

white girl: that wasnt funny but ur still cute

*playful kiss*

*things turn sexy*

*hear noise*

white boy: i'll go investigate

*he leaves and then there's a silence for a long time*

*maybe a thud*

white girl: zack! this isnt funny anymore zack!

*she walks and he dead*

white girl: ahhh!!

*killer shows up with sickle or quirky weapon that distinguishes him from other horror movie villains*

white girl: ahhh!!!

*white girl runs*

*dead end*

*hides*

*thinks she free n safe*

*guy catches her*

*cuts her*

*she dead*

opening title slashes across screen: BLOOD SLICE IN 3-D

jawnzie:

off to dinner with the fam.

jawnzie:

off to dinner with the fam.

So drunk omg

drowningheta:

gallifreyburning:

giraffepoliceforce:

I really want a science fiction story where aliens come to invade earth and effortlessly wipe out humanity, only to be fought off by the wildlife.

They were expecting military resistance. They weren’t counting on bears.

image

Canada’s time to shine has come

(via ruinedchildhood)